Note, this is slightly changed from the original version that I received! )_______________________________ ________________________________Mother’s Signature Father’s Signature_______________________________ ________________________________Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman In the boxes below, please provide Finger Prints, inked in your own blood for Homeland Security Identity Checking and DNA sampling: Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved.
Below is the text from the form, however, I have created a PDF version of it that is probably more useful. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can’t, and it would cause you injury).
However, In order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating.
Kaley Cuoco, Amy Davidson and Martin Spanjers co-starred as their teenage kids; Bridget, Kerry and Rory Hennessy.
The series ran on ABC from September 17, 2002 to April 15, 2005.
If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter? Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget.
Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you? You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter.
Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter:- Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.- Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight.- Places where there is darkness.- Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness.- Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat.- Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay.- Hockey games are okay.- Old folks homes are better. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been.
My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge.
I came across this today and, since I am the father of three girls, decided to make it public for possible suitors to prepare themselves as well as for other fathers who may need it. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Church you attend ___________________________________________________How often you attend ________________________________________________When would be the best time to interview your: Father? A woman’s place is in the:______________________________________________________________D. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:______________________________________________________________E. ______________________________________________________________F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:______________________________________________________________G. __________________I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE._________________________________________________________Applicant’s Signature (that means sign your name, moron!
Do you have an earring, nose ring, pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?
8 Simple Rules (originally 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter for the first season) is an American sitcom, originally starring John Ritter and Katey Sagal as middle-class parents Paul and Cate Hennessy raising a family of three.